fritz

",most filled with bicycles and washer and driers" When they get down here, they also have a lot of hundred dollar bills, the reward for "towing" drugs up north. fritz

Farm tractor parts always seem to run higher than auto parts, but wait until a tractor make is no longer being made (like David Brown), and you will pay even more. And have to wait longer for the parts, because they come from what is known as the "slow movers" warehouse. I recently paid $50 for a decal the size of a bumper sticker, $48 for a rubber boot that goes over the gear shift, and $47 for a little headlamp bracket. These were for a David Brown tractor of the 80's. And the cost of the parts will not be quoted until they arrive---and then you are stuck with either paying for them or getting put on the dealer's schittlist. Restoring tractors is much more expensive than restoring old rifles, my friends. Or old cars. fritz

Thanks Tony, I have to show mrs fritz the one about the nurse. She comes home pretty tired sometimes, and maybe I should ask her where the thermometer is. On second thought, maybe not! fritz

Well of course we all do things like this sometimes. Karl mentioned his experiences in shopping for a car for him and the hippie. He was impressed by the foreign cars, and said they were better built than the American counterparts. I have had just about every make made, except the luxury sports cars of Europe. I have never been disappointed in the foreign cars after around 1970. That was when American automakers began pushing their junk on the market when Germany and Japan were sending us better cars. The same goes for farm tractors----some of the best farm equipment was (and is today) being made overseas. I have two England made David Brown tractors that were the best on the market. And still would be except for the fact that the factory closed down years ago. Reason----American mega-manufactury bought them out and then closed them down so they could sell their junk to us instead. Now we are buying green tractors with "John Deere" on the hood, but made in Germany and France. Much of the green painted implements are made in Italy. I have a hay rake that says "John Deere" but is made by Tonutie in Italy. The European companies make much of our hay equipment, because they had an idea that is just now being realized here as being a better way to put up hay. They have been doing it for a long time. Hell, the Ford truck I bought in 1968 had Canadian parts, so did the Dodge truck I bought later. Both were the sorriest trucks I ever had. But they pale in comparison to the Ford Maverick car I bought for mrs fritz. Many was the time she was "FOUND ON THE ROAD DEAD" ford. fritz

"Praise Jesus if that's the case. " It is so, and the Texas DPS has already begun stopping Mexican trucks and issuing citations for unsafe vehicles and the failure to fulfill the NAFTA requirement that Mexican truckers be able to speak and read English. It only makes sense, road signs are printed in English (at least now) and we all know how a defective truck can cause more wrecks than a properly maintained one. How many properly maintained trucks have you seen in Mexico? For that matter, how many properly maintained cars have you seen in Mexico? I don't know if they pass through your neck of the woods, but here on one of the main routes to (and from) the border, we see trucks with Mexican plates towing some of the junkiest looking cars down to Mexico. They buy our junkers and take them down there. Since there is no safety inspections in Mexico, these junkers are on the streets of Mexico tomorrow. Sorry, but I do not want their schitty trucks coming through my town (which is on one of the main routes to (and from) the border. The reason I mention to and from in the same sentence is because there is so much trafficking of drugs "from" and drug money "to" the border. But, and there is always a but----under NAFTA, American truckers must be able to speak spanish in Mexico. Why in hell don't we just leave things they way they are? Answer----NAFTA! BTW, the same thing as sending our junk cars to Mexico applies to our used tractors. When I was first starting farming, I was shopping for a used tractor. There was a Farmall diesel on this dealer's lot that needed work, and I figured I could get it cheap (I was a young farmer, not yet a Gentleman Farmer). The dealer refused my fair offer for it, and said he could sell it to Mexico for more! So, Mexico has screwed me more than once. I won't mention the times I (forget it). fritz

"With regard to the driver's license issue: You do not have to be able to read (any language) or understand English to drive in Texas. If you can't read (or can't read English) you can have the licensing exam read to you. Further, you must demonstrate that you understand what the street signs mean and demonstrate a basic ability to drive you vehicle without running anyone over. That, and a small fee, are about all it takes to get a driver's license in Texas. What illegals do when they want a license is they'll go down to the local DPS office and get a state issued ID card. They'll sit on that for 30-90 days (however long they have to) and then they'll take their shinny new ID card down the DPS office, take and pass the licensing exam for a driver's license, and end up with a driver's license. They're not here legally....but they're legal to drive. " I believe that only pretains to a regular license. It is my understanding that a CDL requires the ability to speak and read English. fritz

It is kinda a spinoff of the old "no tickee, no laundry" but the DPS is starting to pull over truckers and enforce the OLD law that ALL truckers speak and READ english. That's good, if they will just keep doing it. I bet Bush don't like it! fritz

Subject: "Fly Your Flag" Get your flag ready for 09/11/2007. Please join us in this FLY THE FLAG campaign and PLEASE forward this Email immediately to everyone in your address book asking them to also forward it. We have a little less than one week and counting to get the word out all across this great land and into every community in the United States of America. If you forward this email to least 11 people and each of those people do the same .. you get the idea. THE PROGRAM: On Monday, September 11th, 2007, an American flag should be displayed outside every home, apartment, office, and store in the United States. Every individual should make it their duty to display an American flag on this sixth anniversary of our country's worst tragedy. We do this in honor of those who lost their lives on 9/11, their families, friends and loved ones who continue to endure the pain, and those who today are fighting at home and abroad to preserve our cherished freedoms. In the days, weeks and months following 9/11, our country was bathed in American flags as citizens mourned the incredible losses and stood shoulder-to-shoulder against terrorism. Sadly, those flags have all but disappeared. Our patriotism pulled us through some tough times and it shouldn't take another attack to galvanize us in solidarity. Our American flag is the fabric of our country and together we can prevail over terrorism of all kinds Action Plan: So, here's what we need you to do .. (1) Forward this email to everyone you know (at least 11 people). Please don't be the one to break this chain. Take a moment to think back to how you felt on 9/11 and let those sentiments guide you. (2) Fly an American flag of any size on 9/11. Honestly, Americans should fly the flag year-round, but if you don't, then at least make it a priority on this day. Thank you for your participation. God Bless You and God Bless America! fritz

"The warrantee I had on my Plymouth Grand Voyager easily paid for itself. I went through 5 CD players, and a serious electrical problem. I think there was some other stuff too. " Well, that's because you bought a Dodge product. Haven't you heard the old sayings about Dodge products? In one it mentions that a Ford is just a "F---ing Old Recapped Dodge". Yes, with those you need all the warranties you can get. But let something go wrong with your powertrain, and unless it runs in oil, you are screwed. Lifetime warrantees, if they were worth the paper they were written on, would bankrupt the automakers. But, there is a market out there for consumers with money to burn, and they will keep these automakers out of bankruptsy by buying their inferior products. fritz

A friend is someone we turn to when our spirits need a lift A friend is someone we treasure for our friendship is a gift. A friend is someone who fills our lives with beauty, joy, and grace. And makes the world we live in a better and happier place. There is a miracle called friendship, that dwells in the heart. You do not know how it happens or when it gets it's start But you know the special lift it always brings. You realize that friendship is the world's most precious gift! to my friends, fritz

I hate haggling with car salesmen, especially those at the big mega-dealerships, where the young kid who gets the first shot at you don't know schitt from shinola about anything automotive. He is only there to save time for the big shots who have the authority to lower the price. The last new car I bought, I let mrs fritz chit-chat with the kid, told her what the bottomline was, and that I was going to the men's room and when I came out if the dealership wanted to haggle anymore, we're gone. We bought the car. As to the extended warrantees, read what Consumer Reports says about them (in fact, read what Consumer Reports says about the car before you shop). They may not be perfect, but they know more than the average consumer (with money to burn) does. Extended warrantees? Forget them. "If the dealer ever can't find your keys after taking your car to determine the trade-in value, call the police. The cops get fed-up with the calls and eventually take somebody to jail if they keep getting calls. " I know of a case where the deal fell through, and the guy who had appraised the trade-in threw the keys on top of the roof of the building. Bad business. fritz

TOP 35 > OXYMORONS > > 35. State worker > > > 34. Legally drunk > > > 33. Exact estimate > > > 32. Act naturally > > > 31. Found missing > > > 30. Resident alien > > > 29. Genuine imitation > > > 28. Airline food > > > 27. Good grief > > > 26. Government organization > > > 25. Sanitary landfill > > > 24. Alone together > > > 23. Small crowd > > > 22. Business ethics > > > 21. Soft rock > > > 20. Amtrak schedule > > > 19. Military intelligence > > > 18. Sweet sorrow > > > 17. Compassionate conservative > > > 16. "Now, then ..." > > > 15. Passive aggression > > > 14. Clearly misunderstood > > > 13. Peace force > > > 12. Extinct life > > > 11. Plastic glasses > > > 10. Terribly pleased > > > 9. Computer security > > > 8. Political science > > > 7. Tight slacks > > > 6. Definite maybe > > > 5. Pretty ugly > > > 4. Rap music > > > 3. Working vacation > > > 2. Religious tolerance > > > And the No. 1 oxymoron: > > 1. Microsoft Works Now, I have to question #35, since mrs fritz works for the state. But #17 is so true! fritz

Well, it is her birthday. And the card was an autographed photo of GW and Laura saying "Just wishing you a fabulous birthday". I shall have to ask my son in Austin how he obtained the card. Heaven forbid that it was sent to him once before! But then again, I have several autographed photos of GW and Laura at their Crawford ranch, sent to me by them personally. OK, I have had enough jocularity for tonight. fritz

Top Ten most Polite Ways to Say Your Zipper Is Down 10 . The cucumber has left the salad. 9. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells. 8. You need to bring your tray table to the upright and locked position. 7 . Paging Mr. Johnson... Paging Mr. Johnson.. 6. Elvis is leaving the building. 5. The Buick is not all the way in the garage. 4. Our next guest is someone who needs no introduction. 3. You've got a security breach at Los Pantalones. 2. Men may be From Mars..... but I can see something that rhymes with Venus. And the #1 way to tell someone his zipper is unzipped.... 1. I always knew you were crazy, but now I can see your nuts. I remember an old "Tonight Show with Johnny Carson" skit that had him interview the Russian leader who had introduced glastnost. Johnny asked him just what is glastnost, to which he replied, "Well it is openess". Johnny told him that it is probably because of those cheap Russian trousers you wear! fritz

"That was pretty funny. How many other Germans settled there? " Well, let me put it this way--enough that the "powers that be" did not take kindly to the name that they gave to the community that they founded (Germantown), and they were coerced into changing the name of THEIR community. Thay renamed it Schroeder, in honor of the first local boy who was killed in France. He just happened to be of German descent and was fighting for OUR country. Not that it mattered, it seems. I am proud of my German blood and will always remember how my folks were treated here, even after many of them served in OUR armed forces. It just didn't seem to matter. BTW, today is the birthday of mrs fritz. She shares the same date with the "favorite son" of Texas' birthday. Three guesses who that is, and the first two don't count! Hint----he drafted me. fritz

This has to be the wettest year in Texas history, at least along the coastal plains. July set a record in my area for most rain in that month, and it didn't come from a hurricane or tropical storm. Just plain old rain from a low pressure feature that refused to move off. August is not going to set a record on amount of rain, but will probably set a record for most days of rain in that month (august is usually dry here). I have been having one helluva time getting hay baled dry. Today I finally baled up what was cut, after raking it 5 times (4 today). Sure enough, right after getting the baler back to the barn, it cut loose again. I bale in big round bales so it is safe as soon as it hits the ground. But unless it is moved to high ground, it will set in water. It's the schitts, I tell you. And the week ahead only promises more rain, from a wave offshore. It's predicted to go south of Corpus Christi, but I will bet it goes here also. I guess I should be glad that Dean went to Mexico instead of hitting us. mrs fritz, with the State Health Dept., was all set to move up to Kelly AFB in San Antonio to take in the evacuated folks. But it never happened. Kinda reminds me of the movie where Curly was asked if he had killed anybody today----his answer, "The day ain't over yet!" Yep, the year ain't over yet, and the rain ain't over yet. Why did my German ancestors settle here? mrs fritz says it's because this is where the wheels fell off the wagon. Maybe she's right. But I wonder what it would be like if they made it to Fredericksburg. fritz

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it. Never buy a car you can't push. Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you don't have a leg to stand on. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. The early worm gets eaten by the bird, so sleep late. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them? If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy? You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person. Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once. We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors but they all have to learn to live in the same box. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour. Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open. Have an awesome day, and know that someone has thought about you today.... Today, Enjoy being with your friends and make the most of the day!!!! fritz

AzRedneck, What was the size of your class? Sounds like it was bigger than mine. We had fifty in our class, and of course there were a few that were above the rest, but not especially so. And they mellowed over the years, or just didn't show up this year. I know how it is about class reunions, there is always the uncertainty about whether you will make a fool out of yourself. But I just have a few shots of schnapps before, and the rest just falls into place. I know that I can now say some things to the old girls that I didn't have the guts to do so 45 years ago. Time not only heals old wounds, but it creates new opportunities. fritz BTW, I had to post this twice---the glitch is still there.

Tony, I will echo what strait shooter said about promotions and we will be fine if and when you do go out of country. You have set us up real good, and I thank you again for all your work. I understand about promotions, and the LC rank is just about mandatory to get a good retirement. Let's face it fellow, you ain't no kid no mo! Best of luck to you, whatever you decide. fritz

"If you haven't figured it out already, the older you get the faster they go. " Ain't that the truth! Saturday we had my high school class reunion, 45 years. Both me and mrs fritz were members of that class of '62. This was a class of fifty kids, and three couples in it were going "steady" and all three married and are still married (to each other). One couple couldn't make the reunion, and some of the ones who live distant couldn't make it. But there was about half the class there, not bad after 45 years. Of course, there is always the old yearbooks, the school newspapers, the old football programs from those days. One of the autograph books that a very petite girl had us sign in '62 had this entry from a fellow---"When you get old and out of shape, remember that girdles are only $2.98". She is still petite, one of the few who have not gotten to needing that girdle. Yes, the years fly by. I thought that me and mrs fritz were married a long time, but one of the girls claimed 46 years. I believe she made a mistake, since she was single on graduation night. fritz

I have never stayed at a Days Inn, or flown that airline on the list. But as to Southwest Airlines, I believe mrs fritz has flown it without any problems. What I would like to see compared is insurance companies. We all see the TV commercials that flood the tube about insurance companies. The one that we see most here is Progressive, those people must make a lot of money to be able to spend that much on commercials. But there is more money to be made in the insurance game than any other game in town. That is why they advertise so much. So, which company is the worst, and which is the best? I would wager that you would get ten different answers to that question. Let me just give my two centavos on Progressive, and I will leave the rest alone. Personally, I have Allstate, and I am satisfied. Now as to Progressive----those of you who buy into the line of schitt that they are the cheapest, that might be so. But, as we all know by now, you get what you pay for. mrs fritz has had two accidents in San Antonio, both rear-enders where the other guy was at fault. Both times her Crown Vic had to be in the body shop for several days. The first accident involved a fellow with Farmers Insurance, and his company gave mrs fritz a Lincoln Continental to drive until her Ford was fixed. The second accident involved a fellow who had Progressive, and the Ford was in the shop for another few days. But what did Progressive give her to drive? A sub-compact red rollerskate! The rental car company said that it was all Progressive would allow. She was rear -ended in a Crown Vic, and ended up driving a red rollerskate. Thanks Progressive, but I believe we would all be in better hands without you. fritz

Probably unrelated, but what I have noticed lately is that after I have typed out and posted a message, I sometimes get a "I'm sorry, but an error has occured. Your message has been saved". I have to copy and paste it again. But no other change, not even having to log-in again every few days like it was a few months ago. fritz

IT IS SO HOT..... > .....the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. > .....the trees are whistling for the dogs. > .....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. > .....hot water now comes out of both taps. > .....you can make sun tea instantly. > .....you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron. > .....the temperature drops below 95 F (35 C) and you feel a little chilly. > .....you discover that in August it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car. > .....you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window. > .....you actually burn your hand opening the car door. > ....you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. > .....your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" > .....you realize that asphalt has a liquid state. > ....the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter. > .....the cows are giving evaporated milk. > ....farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs > > > fritz

I wish you could hear the music with this one--- I was sittin' in traffic Listenin' to the radio George Strait was singin' "Seashores of Old Mexico" It sounded so good I got an idear I'm gonna go there Since they're all over here The Lone Star State Should be renamed "TEXICO" So long, Texas.. Hello, Mexico I'm gonna swim the Rio Grande at El Paso I'm leavin' tonight I ain't gonna pack I'm only takin' the clothes on my back So long Texas, Hello Mexico I'll drive a rattletrap car with no liability, I'll demand equal rights though I'm there illegally I'll protest in the streets 'Til they finally grant 'em, Sing English words to their National Anthem.. HEY! El Presidente What's right for your people Should be right for me There's no controlling that tide that keeps rolling across the line. This old Texas cowboy feels like my home state is no longer mine. So long, Texas.. Hello, Mexico I'm gonna swim the Rio Grande at El Paso I'm leavin' tonight I ain't gonna pack I'm only takin' the clothes on my back So long Texas, Hello Mexico (Fade) YEP! Turnabout's fair play HECK! I already LOVE the food AND TEQUILA! I'm gonna fly that Lone Star flag and Old Glory EVERY DAY I'm gonna celebrate every Fourth of July I'm gonna make them print them forms in English just for ME! I'm gonna marry me a pretty senorita and we're gonna have free medical care and free education for ALL our kids! Heck! Playin' my ol' guitar's the only OTHER skill I've GOT! Hmm - I wonder if I'll see ol' George Strait over there Hey, Gringo! You're swimming the wrong way, man! Yeah, yeah! I know! Hey, Amigo! Hey, Amigo! You got a SEESTER???? fritz

Of course it is just a myth, but it has churned up a lot of interest around here. The lady who found the animal's carcass on her land, and sent in the remains to be examined (still not answered), has started selling Tee shirts with a depiction of the beast and the words "Summer of the Chupacabra, Cuero Texas". Sales and interest have come from all over, even from a sick boy in a San Antonio hospital, who has shown improvement after being engrossed in the story. The lady, who has been interviewed in several news media, has promised to go there and give him a shirt and tell the story to him. One comedian mentioned making "chalupacabras" from it. Late- breaking news---I have been informed that a neighbor has killed one recently. Details later. There was once a movie "The Commancheros" and the theme song that went "The Commancheros are taking this land!" The chupacabras are taking this land! fritz