odies dad Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 The Perfect Diet I have a Labrador retriever. I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog? On impulse, I told her no, and that I was starting The Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, black guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought the black guy was going to have to have help as he laughingly staggered to the door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest karl Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Best one I read in a LONG time. karl Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
z1r Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Thanks for the good laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Racepres Posted August 1, 2006 Report Share Posted August 1, 2006 I don't look here often... Glad I did!! Can I use it , if I give proper credit??? MV Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odies dad Posted August 2, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 2, 2006 This was emailed to me, so no copyright problems from my end. This is one of the better ones I've heard in a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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